An Atheist Explores the Bible Part 238: Dog Vomit and a Fiery Ending (2 Peter 1-3)

2 Peter 1
Dog Vomit and a Fiery Ending

Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version).

In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology.

For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT

For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP

And now:

2 Peter 1

“For we have not followed cunningly devised fables, when we made known unto you the power and coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, but were eyewitnesses of his majesty.”

It’s funny that in the last book of Peter I mentioned how none of the epistles by those who were supposedly disciples of Jesus make mention of any event other than then resurrection (and that, to be honest, devoid of details compared to the gospel accounts). Here, however, Peter does indeed mention another event that is described in at least some of the gospels, namely the vision of God announcing that Jesus was His son, which occurred on a mountain to only three disciples; Peter and, I think, James and John (hmm… the other epistle writers).

So, on the one hand, at least there is mention of another event, but it’s the least observed and most mystical of all the events – a vision from God. What about the five hundred people that were miraculously fed, or the crowds that followed the disciples all over Galilee?

Anyway, Peter basically gives a progression of righteous acts which reads like the opposite to Yoda’s path to the Dark Side (“Fear leads to anger” etc.). In this case, add virtue to faith, then knowledge, then temperance, then patience, then godliness. Peter tells his followers to remember these things and they will “neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ”. Those who don’t are blind. Peter then talks of his imminent death – “Knowing that shortly I must put off this my tabernacle, even as our Lord Jesus Christ hath shewed me” and warns his listeners to keep faith without him.

2 Peter 2

“But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction.”

Peter waxes poetic about how vile and pernicious, wanton, lascivious (you know, all the usual stuff) people are condemned and for the righteous to (a) avoid them and (b) be a bit smug about things.

He brings up various old testament events- Noah, Sodom and Gomorrah and even bumbling old Balaam and his talking donkey, pointing out how God’s wrath and mercy were evident on those episodes and so, ooh you dirty sinners had better watch out –“But these, as natural brute beasts, made to be taken and destroyed, speak evil of the things that they understand not; and shall utterly perish in their own corruption”.

And it’s worse for apostates and backsliders – “For if after they have escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, they are again entangled therein, and overcome, the latter end is worse with them than the beginning”. He does include the great line about a dog returning to its own vomit, however, which is fun. Personally I find it a good thing when my dogs eat up their own vomit. Saves a lot of messy cleaning up.

2 Peter 3

“Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts”

Peter finishes with a bit of eschatology, promising a fiery end in thematic contrast to the watery destruction of the Flood – “But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.”

And, of course, for us scoffers, don’t be too comfortable that two thousand years have passed since this prophecy without a judgment day, because “one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day”. Which takes me back to my ponderings back in Genesis about whether the “days” of creation were meant as literal 24 hour days or as metaphorical Brahmin days. I would guess it depends on how the reader want to interpret.

So, of course, knowing that everything’s going to end in fire, better be good so that you get to go to the “new heavens and new earth” – “Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless”.

Peter closes with a back-handed compliment to “our beloved brother Paul”, who writes epistles “in which are some things hard to be understood”. Here I will agree with Peter. At least his and James’ epistles were a lot more straightforward; Paul being, I think, the better philosopher whilst James and Peter come across more as men of emotional faith and revelation rather than meditating on notions of good and evil.

And thus for 2 Peter. Pretty straight up, and more of the end-of-days fire and brimstone stuff that underlies the Pascal’s Wager style of belief as an insurance policy. It’s got some nice turns of phrase in it, a lot less dry and complex compared to Paul.