An Atheist Explores the Bible Part 45: Gideon and the soldiers who drink like dogs (Judges 6-10)

Judges 6-10

Gideon and the soldiers who drink like dogs.

Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version).

In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology.

For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT

For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP

And now:

Judges 6

“And the hand of Midian prevailed against Israel: and because of the Midianites the children of Israel made them the dens which are in the mountains, and caves, and strong holds.”

This time the Midianites begin to encroach on Israelites territory, driving them into caves and descending as “grasshoppers for multitude”, which is a nice image. Once again God raises up a judge to fight the invaders, this time Gideon of the tribe of Manasseh. Gideon is not a very trusting young man, and asks for a load of miracles as proof – first an angel causes Gideon’s offerings to be consumed in spontaneous fire, later on Gideon lays a fleece on the ground and asks first for dew on the fleece and not the ground, and then vice versa.

The angel first tells Gideon to destroy his father’s altar to Baal and the sacred grove. Last time these were mentioned I assumed that the groves were sacred to Ashtarte, with Baal and Ashtarte as a kind of husband/wife, sun/moon fertility pairing. However, sacred groves sound very Graeco-Roman but are also a very ancient form of worship (referring once again to The Golden Bough). In a way I think it’s a pity that Judaeo-Christian beliefs didn’t carry sacred groves forwards as I think it would have integrated the natural world more closely to Western culture rather than seen purely as a resource to exploit. However, the tree cathedral of Whipsnade is like a return to older beliefs.

Anyway, Gideon at this time basically replaces Baal worship with an alter dedicated to God, which he calls Jehovahshalom which, correct me if I’m wrong, kind of means “Hello God”. And people get angry because the altar to Baal has been desecrated.

Judges 7

“And the LORD said unto Gideon, The people that are with thee are too many for me to give the Midianites into their hands, lest Israel vaunt themselves against me, saying, Mine own hand hath saved me.”

Gideon, also known as Jerrubbaal after destroying the altar of Baal, raises a host of men. However God deems that the host is too large – any victory that they win they will consider to be due to their own skill and not due to the help of God, so He tells Gideon to thin his ranks. First Gideon sends home anyone who is afraid, then he gets the people to drink at a lake, and only those who lap up the water like a dog (three hundred in all) are selected to fight. Which is an … unusual selection procedure, is all I will say of that.

These three hundred men surround the Midianite host and scare them with trumpets and lanterns, the Midianites rout and their princes Oreb and Zeeb are captured and killed. Oh, there’s some stupid prophetic dream about bread in the middle, which seems pointless.

Judges 8

“And he said unto the men of Succoth, Give, I pray you, loaves of bread unto the people that follow me; for they be faint, and I am pursuing after Zebah and Zalmunna, kings of Midian.”

There’s a bit of a morality play/fairly tale element to this chapter, where Gideon and his men pursue after Kings Zebah and Zalmunna, and en route they ask the cities of Succoth and Penuel for supplies and are refused. Gideon promises retribution on his return, and this is duly delivered. Moral: don’t be an arse.

Gideon offers Zebah and Zalmunna to his eldest son to kill, but his son is too young and balks, so Gideon executes them himself.  Then he melts down all the golden spoils (apparently Ishmaelites like golden earings) and turns them into an ephod, which then seems to invoke greed thereafter amongst the Israelites. Once again there is peace for forty years, Gideon has forty children by many wives and declines the rulership, but when he dies once again the Israelites return to Baal worship. There is reference to the Baalim, which seems to be a plural of Baal, and this time it is Baalberith – I’ve read that “baal” is possibly an honorific term rather than a specific, but then so is “Lord” which is used for the Israelite God; I guess they are applying the same concept.

Judges 9

“And all the men of Shechem gathered together, and all the house of Millo, and went, and made Abimelech king, by the plain of the pillar that was in Shechem.”

Infamy galore in this chapter. Abimelech, one of Gideon’s forty sons, decides to raise himself above the others and hires a bunch of strongarms from Shechem to help him kill his brothers. However the youngest (always the youngest), Jotham, escapes.

Jotham gives an impassioned speech about the trees trying to raise up a leader, but all the useful trees refuse because they are busy bearing fruit; only the bramble accepts (a good metaphor for leadership if ever I heard one). If you are happy with Abimelech, says Jotham, then good for you, but if you think you may have done wrong by Gideon who saved you from the Midianites, then curses be upon you. Then he runs away.

Rebellion rises against Abimelech. Gaal son of Ebed tries to secede from Abimelech’s rule, but eventually he is destroyed and his city thrown down and sown with salt, later Abimelech drives a bunch of people into a temple and burns a thousand men and women to death inside it. Finally he besieges the fortress of Thebez, where a woman drops a millstone on his head and he asks a lieutenant to kill him so that he isn’t killed by a woman. After he dies, his followers melt away.

This is pitched as being Jotham’s curse come back to destroy Abimelech, although not until after a whole load of people have been killed in horrible ways.

Judges 10

“And after Abimelech there arose to defend Israel Tola the son of Puah, the son of Dodo, a man of Issachar; and he dwelt in Shamir in mount Ephraim.”

This chapter is a bit of a linking one. Judges Tola and Jair are glossed over – evidently they didn’t do anything of note, and once again the Israelites start worshipping other gods. I get the feeling that there probably wasn’t a flip-flopping of worship, but rather an ongoing conflict between the worshippers of Yahweh and the other gods. Anyway, this time the Philistines and the Ammonites are the foreign invaders du jour, and once again the Israelites ask God for help, and once again God points out that He’d like to, but the people keep turning away from Him, so why should He?

And the chapter ends on a cliff-hanger of sorts, where the princes of Gilead ask the rhetorical question “who will save us now?” Dun-dun-DUNN!