An Atheist Explores the Qur'an Part 75: Allah’s Bondage Dungeon (The Inevitable (al-Haqqar))

The Inevitable (al-Haqqar) 1-52
Allah’s Bondage Dungeon.

Welcome to the next instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Qur’an version).

In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the Qur’an, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology.

For more detail, see the introductory post https://bit.ly/2ApLDy0

For the online Qur’an that I use, see here http://al-quran.info and http://quran.com

The Inevitable (al-Haqqar) 1-20

“The Besieger! What is the Besieger?! What will show you what is the Besieger?!”

The Besieger!!! is al-Haqqar, also translated as The Inevitable. It seems a little odd in this translation to give one meaning for the title and then change it for the first verse. But as I’ve mentioned before, sometimes the translation choices are a little esoteric. Take for example, later on in this chapter where God punishes the faithless - “He seized them with a terrible seizing”. This is probably why people say it’s better in the original Arabic, because sometimes it just doesn’t seem to work in English the way it’s been translated.

Speaking of God punishing the faithless; on the version of the Qur’an I’m using, each chapter is preceded by a bit of explanatory text and a summary, which have been most useful, particularly pertaining to the various battles for Mecca. The text for this chapter reads “The surah describes punishment in this life (verse 4 ff.) and the next (verse 13 ff.). The bliss to be enjoyed by the believers is eloquently contrasted with the torments of hell (verse 19 ff.). From verse 38 onwards, God affirms the Truth of the Quran and the Prophet”. So… pretty much the same as every other surah so far. Oh well. I can live with that.

There’s also, although the explanatory text doesn’t mention it, a brief description of prior places - Thamūd destroyed by “the Cry” and ʿĀd, destroyed by an icy gale that blows for seven days. Also mentioned are Noah’s flood, and presumably the Pharaoh from Moses’ story – these are the people that are seized with great seizing.

And then we move on to The Inevitable (Day), the end times when “the sky will be split open —for it will be frail that day“. Can we excuse this as a metaphor ? Or is this the work of people that genuinely thought that the sky was a crystal dome, and basically got it wrong? Also odd in this apocalyptic vision is something straight out of Ezekiel - “the Throne of your Lord will be borne that day by eight [angels]”. Strange, because I was under the impression that Allah was considered to be much more of an ineffable entity than the Old Man In The Sky figure of old Yahweh. I can imagine a “Throne of God” as a metaphorical construct, a kind of well-spring and centre to the nature or quiddity of God. But “borne by eight angels”? Maybe there’s meant to be some numerological secret hidden there, I don’t know. Let’s see what happens next.

The Inevitable 21-52

“But as for him who is given his book in his left hand, he will say, ‘I wish I had not been given my book”

First of all – nothing more about the Throne of God. What we get instead are contrasting descriptions of the fate awaiting the faithful (gardens with fruit) and the faithless (which gets a more vivid explanation). For not feeding the hungry, the faithless are made to eat “nor any food except pus”. Well, there’s that boiling water to wash it down with, as mentioned in other chapters.

For some reason the faithless are bound “in a chain whose length is seventy cubits”. This is roughly  35 metres, taking a rough median of the varying sizes of cubit. I wondered if this was someone tied to a chain and they could only walk 35m away from a fixed point, but thinking about it perhaps it’s meant to imply a long chain wrapped around and around the person until they are bound solid.

Which really does raise the question – why? Why on earth go to all that bother of making some elaborate eternal torments involving pus and fire and chains and boiling water? What is the point? What really is the point? A person in hell can never repent, never apologise or make up for their wrong-doings. It’s just a futile exercise in petty vengeance. What kind of weird deity would do that kind of crap? Just make faithless people non-existent after they die, if it means that much to you.

Okay. Last bit, where it’s decreed that this is a true and accurate Word of God ™, and the Prophet isn’t merely a poet (no, he most certainly isn’t), nor a soothsayer, and had he been other than a true Prophet then God would have “cut off his aorta”.

Remind me – we’re supposed to worship this guy?