An Atheist Explores the Qur'an Part 69: Stacked Logs and Neal Stephenson (The Hypocrites (al-Munafiqun))

The Hypocrites (al-Munafiqun)
Stacked Logs and Neal Stephenson

Welcome to the next instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Qur’an version).

In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the Qur’an, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology.

For more detail, see the introductory post https://bit.ly/2ApLDy0

For the online Qur’an that I use, see here http://al-quran.info and http://quran.com

The Hypocrites (al-Munafiqun) 1-11

“When the hypocrites come to you they say, ‘We bear witness that you are indeed the apostle of Allah.’ Allah knows that you are indeed His Apostle, and Allah bears witness that the hypocrites are indeed liars.”

Before getting to the chapter itself, a diversion. In the Neal Stephenson book “Anathem”, some characters construct what amounts to a one man space craft. One of the characters, who we the audience know is French but the other characters assume to be from an alien world, pronounces “C’est magnifique”. The other characters think he is saying “Say ‘monyafeek’”, and so the little one-man craft become known as “monyafeeks”. I only bring this up because the Arabic title for this chapter – al-Munafiqun – makes me think of the word “monyafeek”.

But this isn’t about little one-man spacecraft and linguistic misunderstandings, it’s about people that claim to believe in the Prophet’s teachings, but in reality don’t. Confusingly it seems that “they believed and then disbelieved”, so for some reason they were once believers but gave it up (which doesn’t seem to make Allah’s message very compelling). Or possibly they are in some kind of quantum uncertainty state of belief/non-belief. Or perhaps the first belief was in pagan gods. It doesn’t really make sense.

The hypocrites are apparently very charismatic - “When you see them, their bodies impress you, and if they speak, you listen to their speech” and also narcissistic - “They suppose every cry is directed against them”. But they are like “dry logs set reclining [against a wall]”. Which is… what? What properties do dry logs and hypocrites share in common? Lighter than you expect?; Ready for a good burning? (Almost certainly); Not doing a lot but useful in the winter?; Full of spiders? I don’t think this metaphor translates well.

There are a few more examples of hypocritical behaviour from hypocrites, but nothing very exciting. The chapter ends with some advice on How To Be Good, mainly urging charity - “Spend from what We have provided you before death comes to any of you”; that’s a kind of “you can’t take it with you” sentiment.  And the chapter ends with a foreboding reminder that Allah sees all that you do, and doesn’t offer second chances. Dun Dun Dunnn!

It’s another brief chapter (11 verses) and pretty straight and to the point, for once actually doing what it says in the title for most of its length. Mind you, it’s hardly unique in attacking the hypocrites; there are other chapters that could bear this title with as much relevance as they bear the one they were given.