Dr Simon Reads...

Jeremiah 6-10 How many times do you need to be told: don’t burn your children! Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Jeremiah 6 “O ye children of Benjamin, gather yourselves to flee out of the midst of Jerusalem, and blow the trumpet in Tekoa, and set up a sign of fire in Bethhaccerem: for evil appeareth out of the north, and great destruction.” It occurred to me this morning that I should try to bear in mind that the term “ prophet ” in the biblical sense seems to mean someone who speaks with God’s voice, not specifically someone who predicts the future, although they will often do that (presumably because if God exists outside time He c...

Jeremiah 1-5 Prophecy is bad for the bowels, apparently. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Jeremiah 1 “The words of Jeremiah the son of Hilkiah, of the priests that were in Anathoth in the land of Benjamin” I know nothing of the book of Jeremiah. Potentially this could be interesting, provided it isn’t just a repeat of the “woe, woe and thrice woe” of the prophecies of Isaiah. This chapter is introductory, setting Jeremiah in context from the reigns of Josiah all the way up to the reign of Zedekiah, at which point the Babylonians and Assyrians carry the Israelites off into exile. So, presumably, Jeremiah is going to be composing this...

Isaiah 61-66 A Mysterious Figure in Red ™. Plus; Damn You, Filthy Mice-Eaters! Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 61 “ The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound” The speaker is moved by the spirit of God to prophesy a time of plenty for the Israelites. This is couched in some very nice poetry and similes, but for all that is nothing new to this book – the Israelites will get twice as much joy as they did suffering, and this i...

Isaiah 56-60 Sorceresses, cockatrices and a Breastplate of Vengeance: It’s all gone a bit Dungeons and Dragons. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 56 “The Lord GOD which gathereth the outcasts of Israel saith, Yet will I gather others to him, beside those that are gathered unto him.” A short chapter, and in this one the worship of God is opened up to others – sons of strangers and even eunuchs, as long as they keep the Sabbath and obey unspecified purity laws. Although, I have to say that it seems a bit mean to say to eunuchs that “ I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off ”. I mean, rubbing it in a bit? ...

Isaiah 51-55 Suspiciously Shoe-Horned Prophecies. Plus: The Cup of Trembling. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 51 “Hearken to me, ye that follow after righteousness, ye that seek the LORD: look unto the rock whence ye are hewn, and to the hole of the pit whence ye are digged.” More words of encouragement to the Israelites; the speaker is not clear but I think the intent is that it is God speaking through a prophet. The essential message from God to the Israelites is that they shouldn’t worry, because in the grand scheme of things their oppressors are mere mortals, and even the earth and heavens don’t last forever, but the le...

Isaiah 46-50 Musing on Free Will. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 46 “ And even to your old age I am he; and even to hoar hairs will I carry you : I have made, and I will bear; even I will carry, and will deliver you .” A fairly short chapter, but its brevity works well. God offers hope to the remnant, that the time of salvation is near and that He will call a man from the east to do His bidding, as a “ ravenous bird ”. At the same time He takes the opportunity to remind the Israelites that He is the only God “ for I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me ”, able to see from the start to t...

Isaiah 41-45 Trees are really useful: don’t worship them. Plus Ragged Trousered Philanthropists. Plus a thinly-veiled Trump reference. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 41 “Keep silence before me, O islands; and let the people renew their strength: let them come near; then let them speak: let us come near together to judgment.” Well, it’s good to start a new batch of chapters with something obscure. This chapter would appear to be God speaking, telling of how He raised a “ righteous man from the east ” who conquered all before him, so that “ islands ” (perhaps meaning disparate nations?) drew together. There’s quite a lot of r...

Isaiah 36-40 Drinking urine, Hezekiah’s boil, and religious road-signs. Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version). In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology. For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP And now: Isaiah 36 “Now it came to pass in the fourteenth year of king Hezekiah, that Sennacherib king of Assyria came up against all the defenced cities of Judah, and took them.” Rather thankfully Isaiah leaves prophecy aside for a moment, and turns to history. I find these passages more interesting as they recount a sequence of events that is pretty straightforward, rather than attempting to unpick meaning from metaphor and oblique references. And we’ve been here before, back in Kings and Chronicles. King Sennacherib of Assyria sends...