An Atheist Explores the Bible Part 73: Satan makes his first appearance, but it doesn’t make the book any more interesting (1 Chronicles 21-25)

1 Chronicles 21-25
Satan makes his first appearance, but it doesn’t make the book any more interesting.

Welcome to another instalment of An Atheist Explores Sacred Texts (Bible version).

In this series I work my way chapter-by-chapter through the King James Bible, commenting on it from the point of view of the text as literature and mythology.

For more detail, see the introductory post http://bit.ly/2F8f9JT

For the online KJV I use, see here http://bit.ly/2m0zVUP

And now:

1 Chronicles 21

“And Satan stood up against Israel, and provoked David to number Israel.”

This is the first mention of Satan in the bible. Yes, there was the serpent in Eden, but there’s nothing in the text that suggests that it is anything other than just a snake, despite what Milton may say. Here, Satan is giving David bad ideas to act on; in previous chapters if someone has acted rashly it has usually been put down to God making them do it because He was angry with them for some reason. There’s no context of who or what Satan is, either. Sometimes an un-named angel does the placement of bad ideas for God; none of the “foreign” deities given have ever been mentioned as having these kinds of powers so he’s not some Amorite or Philistine or Syrian god. All in all it’s a very underwhelming debut for the “adversary” of Christian belief.

This chapter is a repeat of an incident previously given in Samuel, where God becomes angry at David and gives him the choice of one of three punishments – three years of famine, three months of enemy invasion or three days of plague. David takes option number three, thank you.

However, in Samuel it is David lusting after Uriah the Hittite’s wife that causes God’s anger, here its … taking a census. Joab disapproves, but there’s no reason I can see why it should be a bad thing to do. Very strange. Two things though; the Israelites number a million (a “thousand thousand”) fighting men, and Joab leaves out the Levites and Benjaminites out of anger).

Anyway, the plague happens and then God relents. His angel of death stops in the middle of Ornan the Jebusite’s threshing floor. David can see it, and erects an altar there, after buying the threshing floor from Ornan for a fair price (who can’t see the angel). The angel departs, but David is still afraid of the place where it stood. Oh, and the prophet is now Gad, where before he was Nathan.

1 Chronicles 22

“And David said, Solomon my son is young and tender, and the house that is to be builded for the LORD must be exceeding magnifical, of fame and of glory throughout all countries: I will therefore now make preparation for it. So David prepared abundantly before his death.”

I use this quite because I love “exceeding magnifical” and shall use it to describe things that are good from now on. In this chapter David has a little father-son talk with Solomon, passing on the building of the temple to his care (David having spilled too much blood to be worthy of the honour, whereas Solomon is young and innocent, and destined for a peaceful reign). He passes on some wisdom (be strong and of good courage), shows Solomon all the materials he has brought for building the temple, and commands his men to follow Solomon.

1 Chronicles 23

“These were the sons of Levi after the house of their fathers; even the chief of the fathers, as they were counted by number of names by their polls, that did the work for the service of the house of the LORD, from the age of twenty years and upward.”

David divides the Levites into groups with different tasks in the temple (redefining their old roles concerning the mobile tabernacle), and most of this chapter concerns the genealogy of the Levites. The roles are pretty much as you’d expect – keeping the purity of the temple, offering sacrifices, playing music, making the bread for sacrifice and so on.

1 Chronicles 24

“Thus were they divided by lot, one sort with another; for the governors of the sanctuary, and governors of the house of God, were of the sons of Eleazar, and of the sons of Ithamar.”

I don’t quite understand what happens in this chapter. I think that the specific descendants of Aaron are placed in the highest ranks amongst the Levites, and that lots are chosen to select representatives. But I’m not sure. Mostly, it’s a list of names and for the rest the phraseology is archaic to the point of illegibility.

1 Chronicles 25

“Moreover David and the captains of the host separated to the service of the sons of Asaph, and of Heman, and of Jeduthun, who should prophesy with harps, with psalteries, and with cymbals: and the number of the workmen according to their service was:”

Singers and musicians for the temple are appointed, again by lot. Most of this chapter is a list of names, with the formula “The nth to X, his, his sons, and his brethren, were twelve.” It does this twenty four times. It isn’t fun to read.